White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize
