i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
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