tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
my poor anus
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
