Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Randomize
