so that wasnt chicken after all
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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