I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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