nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
