Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
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I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
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when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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