I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
