Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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