watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Someone signed my nipple.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize