Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
