Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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