Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
people are starting to question the shark bite story
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
