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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam

  (212): View more from New York

  enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening

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• (925): View more from California

  Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  I have a surprise for you guys

  (937): View more from Ohio

  What is it?

  (740): View more from Ohio

  A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS

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• 

  These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities

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• (512): View more from Texas

  There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji

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• (506): View more from New Brunswick

  he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead

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• (585): View more from New York

  I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.

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