I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
She told me I should be a condom model.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
