it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Randomize
