oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Randomize
