ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
