I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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