did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
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WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
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You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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