I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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