I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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