8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
