I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
ttyl tear gas
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
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