Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
foreskin is a definite game changer
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
