Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
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We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
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Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
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