Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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