I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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