I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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