Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I could make wine with my vomit
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Randomize
