Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
third nipple confirmed
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
