do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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