Responsibility does not care about your dick.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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