THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
