last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
my sisters under your porch take her home
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
