My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
