The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
how does that bad decision feel?
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
