Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize
