so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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