I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
