If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
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