I want to walk on stilts...naked
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
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