i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Randomize
