my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
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