Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
