shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
