Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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