Non-Jews are for practice
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Randomize
