ugly people sure do ruin things
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
