I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
